It’s Derby Week here in my humble hometown of Louisville, Ky., and you know what that means – time to break out the silly hats! This one goes way back, as you can tell from the yellowing of the photo, to a time when only the very wealthy could afford large hats; the majority of the population was relegated to wearing hats of normal proportions.
The war between the haves and the have-nots has done nothing but escalate, of course, and today the Great Hat Disparity of 1973 still burns fresh in the memory of those who lived through it. More people can buy large hats today, thanks to cheap foreign labor and an influx of inexpensive materials; however, the credit market is flooded with high-interest loans designed to get people into hats that they cannot really afford. You have no business leasing a hat, people, and if the salesman tries to talk you into a lease, then what you’re looking at is simply too much hat.
Oh, and also – helllooooo ladies!
“Judge says, ‘what you got in your defense, son?’ I said ’57 channels and nothing’s on.’” Wouldn’t have had that problem if you had this sucker! I bet this thing could find entertaining content at the drop of an antennae-shaped hat. Why, I bet there’s a button here marked “Gooder Than Hell.” Gotta buy one of these.
Also, hellllloooo ladies!
This is either a huge lady, or a little bitty guy and his dog. I’m thinking it’s the former. Very large. Looks like she’s relaxed, too. Laid back, with her mind on her money and her money on her mind.
This is a nice looking hat. It’s a bit big for her, but it kinda has to be to accommodate that impressive design.
Also, hellllooo ladies!
Bottoms up! Let the good times roll. Copious amounts of liquid bread + girl = gooder than hell!
WOO-HOO! Who wants to go LARPing?!?! YES! You need a big martini if you’re going to do it properly, and it looks like this couple has already downed a comically large cocktail. But they didn’t eat the olives along the way, which is kind of a shame.
Hey, I heard you missed us … we’re back! I brought my pen-cil! Gimme something to write on!