Comically Large Things

You know, looking at this comically large violin makes me think of one thing and one thing only: the violin player from Celtic Woman. She’s really cute! Now, imagine if she was large enough to play this thing – it would be a massive solar-powered entity of cute! A leaning tower of cute!

I also think the blonde one is really cute. Maybe the scientist that builds the embiggening ray for the violin player can make her giant too, so they can perform together.

Man, if I could get my hands on that balalaika, I would totally shred things up! Can you imagine the rocking you can do on that thing? The resonance provided by that large, triangular shape must just be off the charts! Bitchin camaro, my friends!

(Don’t worry if you don’t actually play the balalaika – Balalaika Hero is on the way for Xbox and PS3 this fall. And there’s still a chance that we’ll get Klezmer Klezmer Revolution here in the states this year.)

Man, look at this guitar! I wish I could get my hands on this one. I would totally tear into some “Closer to Fine,” and all ya’alls could just kiss my butt!

Sorry, I didn’t mean to say that. That was rude. But thinking about the Indigo Girls always brings out the aggressive alpha male in me.

Anyway, sweet guitar! Rock on!

Get out of the way, everybody, because I’m about to rock this thing! The mike stand don’t stand a chance! Seriously, how much fun would it be to get on this thing and bust out a few bars of “Precious and Few” by Climax? Or maybe “After the Lovin’” by Engelbert Humperdinck. That’s one of my classics.

Geez, would you look at the size of the knob on this door? It’s ridiculous! Totally out of proportion to the rest of the thing!

Holy crap! Look at this tuba. Who in their right mind would opt to learn such an instrument? “Timmy, what band instrument would you like to learn to play?” “Well, mom, I think I want to play the tuba – but not just any tuba, a tuba that will give me debilitating back pain by the time I’m 20. Pleeeeeze, mom?“

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gMcYzQq5dw&rel=1]
Here we have Doctor Sparkles, performing in front of a freakishly large ukulele. And it appears to be on fire. And by “on fire,” I don’t mean in the conventional sense in which that phrase is frequently used in describing the ukulele – you know, “Man, that ukulele solo is on fire! Smokin’ hot!” No, I mean that there literally appear to be flames on it. Cardboard flames, from the looks of things, but you know, you can never be too careful with a ukulele.