Comically Large Things

Notice the happy look on everybody’s face in this picture. You see it? You see how happy they are to be standing there, smiling for the camera? Well, savor it, because ten seconds after this photo was taken, the pig was lying on the ground, the result of a crotch-ful of this woman’s knee.

Let me tell you something I’ve learned from experience, friends, and you’ll be wise to listen: Giant pigs are all hands. You see one wanting to get a photo with you and the little lady, you be on your guard. Get that ham sandwich look in your eye, and let the bastard know that you mean business.